We just had a wedding in our family. Weddings are an interesting event. I have learned that many people LOVE weddings, others not so much. I'm in the not so much category. I must say that my daughter's recent wedding turned out to be a wonderful event but I'm ever so grateful that most weddings are a once in a lifetime deal.
I mean, who invented all this wedding stuff anyway? I just can't love weddings and all that goes with them.
First, I don't like showers and I really don't like the shower games. I don't understand or enjoy bridesmaids, wedding dresses, bouquet throwing, groomsmen, garter flinging, face cake smashing, and standing around telling people for hours how it's been a wonderful day. I believe I said beautiful a lot on the day of the wedding too. Wonderful and beautiful are not my favorite words. I have other favorite words that just roll off my tongue and are short.
What ever happened to two people getting married by jumping over a broom. That seems fast and cheap.
On a more positive note, I did particularly enjoy a wedding event that my daughters and I planned. We decided we would have a last girls night out with all of the sisters to celebrate the oldest sisters upcoming marriage.
So, my four daughters (my two daughters in law were unable to attend) and myself all met at a local sushi place for dinner. I have one daughter already married who we will call M for married, two not married who we will label as S1 and S2 for single 1 and single 2 and the bride who we will refer to as B for bride.
We ordered our sushi and began to eat when M asked B if she had any questions about her upcoming nuptials and especially her wedding night. B said, "I don't think so. Should I?"
I, of course kept my eyes on the sushi.
Next thing I know, M is giving B an anatomy lesson and drawing pictures of parts in the sushi sauce with her chopstick.
I glanced at those drawings and must say they were anatomically correct as far as I could tell.
B seemed a bit surprised at some of the drawings. S1 made corrections on some of the sauce drawings and S2 was silent probably because she is the youngest sister and was not quite prepared for this type of sushi sauce lesson at dinner.
At one point I was actually asked a question by M which was promptly dismissed by S2 who said, "Mom, for the love of all that is Holy, please do not answer that question and say anything right now."
I stayed silent knowing that anything that would come out of my mouth would be deemed entirely gross by everyone at the table. I just shut my yap and pretended to be intrigued by tiny fish eggs on the top of the sushi.
Once M got B straightened out about male and female anatomy and gave a few words of advice, the lesson ended. I breathed a sigh of relief and realized that even I learned some new things. S1 seemed satisfied with the explanations and advice. S2 was in shock and sat quietly starring straight ahead at nothing and B was thinking that she was now sufficiently knowledgeable in most matters of anatomy and her upcoming wedding night.
With the lesson completed, B picked up her chopsticks and plucked the last remaining piece of sushi sitting in the middle of the anatomy sushi sauce and popped it into her mouth.
Well, you should have seen M at this juncture. Her jaw dropped open and her eyes bugged out. She put on her most disgusted face and said, "I can't believe you would eat that piece of sushi after what I just drew in that sauce!"
Yes, this was my most favorite of the wedding events. Who needs a reception when you can have sushi, a sushi sauce anatomy lesson and your four daughters there to teach it.
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