WWF Moves and My Sister

My sister and I when we were still nice

Back in the day when I was an annoying 12 year old, my parents had gone out to dinner so my sisters, my best friend and I were supervising ourselves.  We decided to watch some TV.      I was sitting on the couch with younger sister Mindy sitting on one side of me and my friend sitting on the other side of me.  My oldest sister Marti was sitting on the floor right in front of me so that her head was by my feet.  Picture this, I was sitting so that my bare feet were up on the couch cushion and my knees tucked up by my chin. I would call it a sitting fetal position. My toes were possibly touching her hair.    

You're thinking that I had stinky feet right?  Nope.  Marti said, "Your toes are touching my hair.  Move them."  Instead of removing my toes from her hair or Marti moving her body either direction, I just wiggled my toes in her long, brunette, 70's feathered hair.  This is how the body slam of 1972 began.  

Marti turned around and cranked my toes backwards then turned back around to watch TV.  I proceeded to do the sisterly thing and just kicked her in the back of her noggin.  

Marti stood up and grabbed the offending foot of mine and pulled me off the couch.  My tailbone hit the hard floor first and it wasn't pleasant.  All that went through my mind was "GAME ON!"  My friend who was sitting right next to me on the couch saw the escalation in our violence and promptly stood up and announced that her mom was calling her so she should go home.  I didn't want my friend to go home just because my sister and I were having a tiffle.  I looked over at her and I very firmly said, "You can't hear your mom calling from a block away.  Sit down and shutty."

Marti was 14 at the time.  She was taller than me, weighed more than me and had full blown boosies.  As sisters you all know that if you have those then you have all the power.  I don't know what came over me though, because I snapped.  Maybe it was the fact that both my big toe and tail bone had been injured or that I wanted my friend to know that despite my injuries and missing mammies, I still had some moxie.

Marti and I wrestling in our babushka's and bell bottoms

Marti and I stood there, in the middle of the family room, facing off, my eye balls staring at the all powerful bosom of my older and much larger sister.  Next thing I knew, I hoisted Marti up by the waist and did an amazing WWF bodyslam.  I'll be honest. It felt good.  You would think that I'd strut myself back to the couch to sit by my friend and younger sister to gloat but I didn't.  First, I was so shocked that I was capable of body slamming Marti that I just stood there looking down at her in a heap on our green shag carpet. Next I started feel bad.  Marti started to cry and slowly stood up, brushed off her bell bottoms and straightened out her halter top.  She looked me right in my evil yet powerful eye and said, "I don't cry very easily but when I do it's really bad."  

As she walked toward the bathroom door, all drama and stomping platforms, she turned to me and said in her snarkiest voice, "Just wait until mom and dad hear about this!"   I knew I was toast if this got back to my parents.  I grew up with 4 sisters and no bothers so this kind of fighting was not tolerated well in our house.  Where were my much needed big, bad brothers that would have really big, nasty fights.  If I had some brothers, then using my WWF moves on Marti wouldn't be such a big deal. 

The thing is though, I had dirt on Marti.  Just a few weeks prior to this incident Marti had snuck out of the house to go to a friends house and I caught her in the act.  I had been holding onto this info until just the right moment and this was it.  I marched myself to the bathroom where she had locked herself in to have a cry.  I rapped on the door and reminded her of her recent sneaking infraction.  The door immediately popped open and Marti's red rimmed eyes appeared around the door.  She cry-whined, "What do you want."  I told her that I saw her sneaking out so she better not tell on my bodyslam.

Mindy-You did what? Me-Marti did it!  Marti-She's so mean

She was mad but she was guilty too.  We both agreed to never tell our parents what transpired that night or the night when she snuck out.  It was the classic  "I won't tell if you don't tell."  

We both walked back into the family room, satisfied that we had an agreement.   Of course we sat at opposite ends of the couch so no body parts would touch each other.  My friend had skedaddled by then.  Sitting between us was my little sister Mindy, just 2 years younger that I was.  She looked at both of us and said, "I'm telling mom and dad on both of you."  

Ahhh.....sisters.  

I guess we were always stinkers.  Looking at this picture I can clearly
see that I'm the pill on the left, Mindy is the scared infant in the middle because she's
wedged between her sisters and Marti is the guilty party on the right.