I'm talking about the time when Mickey decided to ask my dad for my hand in marriage.
Mickey went over to see my dad and the marriage conversation went something like this:
Mickey: Marvin, I would like to ask your permission to marry your daughter Shari
Marvin: It's time for a fishing trip Mickey. Get your fishing things together and be at my house this Thursday at 6:00 a.m. We'll go fishing up in the Uintas and take the horses.
Mickey: That would be great! I love to fish!
(I guess the fact that he wanted to get married to me was put on the back burner now that he was going on his fantasy fishing trip with my dad)
Mickey came waltzing into my house later that night and said excitedly, "I'm going fishing with your dad this week. This is going to be great."
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| This is not Mickey fishing with my dad cause are no chairs allowed when you fish with him. |
Considering the fact that my dad raised five daughters and I knew my dad well, I was thinking "OH MY............THIS GUY HAS NO CLUE! What I said was.....Well Mickey, have you ever cried fishing?
Mickey looked at me with a blank stare and said, "No. Why?"
Oh the poor naive fool. If I was him I would just look at me and say, "Sorry, you are so not worth it." Instead he just said, "Fishing is one of my favorite things to do and we are going to have the best time ever! I can't wait!"
I felt sorry for Mickey because he had known my dad for years and knew that my dad was the ultimate grinder and competitor. My dad is not a normal human being. He feels no pain. He knows no fear. He never says die. Mickey knew this and yet he couldn't see what was coming. My dad was testing his manhood! Mickey actually thought Marvin was being his friend.
Perhaps if Mickey was so stupid then he SHOULD go fishing. I told Mickey, "Have a good time fishing but you are going to cry."
Let's jump ahead to the morning of the fishing trip. Mickey pulled up to my dad's house, got out of the car, unloaded his schnife and before my dad would load Mickey's fishing gear he said, "Let's see what you've got."
That's a bad sign.
My dad plowed through Mickey's stuff. He threw his sleeping bag into the truck saying, I guess you'll need this, then his rain gear.......I suppose you'll need this, then ONE fishing pole.
Mickey looked at his mountain of "fun fishing gear" left sitting in the driveway and said, "Hey Marv, what about the rest of my stuff."
My dad walked off to load the horses and just said, "My horses aren't packing all that stuff up there."
Mickey was toast. Understand that Mickey loves fishing and camping but it's not Marvin fishing and camping. For Mickey it's all about the comfort and food. He DOES NOT FISH without his laffy taffy, pork rinds, hard tack candy, grape soda and that stinky, cheesy fish bait and fish eggs to lure in the fish.
So off they went....my dad, Bill who is one of my dads former Olympic friends who competed in the biathlon (this means that this guy is a hard core athlete who has stamina not like regular human beings) and Mr. Laffy Taffy (my future husband......if he survived)
Now I will do a quick summary of the trip. Mickey said that when they got to the base of the Uintas, they unloaded the horses, saddled the horses and began the journey to get to the place where they would fish.
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| Marv fishing. This is not as fun as it looks. |
What Mickey didn't understand is that fishing with my dad is not just fishing but it's survival. You have to go hundreds of miles to get to where you fish and getting there ISN'T all the fun. You can't eat (you only eat what you catch with a fly or your bare hands) or drink or go potty or you will show signs of weakness. (My dad skis with these rules too).
As Mickey tells it, within 20 minutes after starting the horse ride, he found out he was violently allergic to horses. He started sneezing, then coughing, and then his eyes started to swell shut. Of course he didn't have any benedryl because my dad's horses aren't packing that stuff.
Mickey said he rode on in misery. Then he said he started to get saddle sore. Now Mickey had never ridden a horse before unless it was at a fair, in a circle for 10 minutes. This was a whole new ballgame. He said he was so saddle sore that after a few hours he decided to walk. As he describes it, it was more than 20 miles that he walked before they stopped without resting but it was still better than sitting in that saddle.
Mickey said he then got diaper rash from being in the saddle so long and that there was entirely too much chaffing going on.
I said, "All this happened in the first couple of hours and you were gone for three days?" I really don't know how he survived.
Mickey said that he kept looking at my dad and Bill to see if they were drinking because he was dying of thirst and he said that they never even took a sip. So he decided he would lag behind and sneak a sip of water.
How pathetic.
The first night he said they camped out under the stars which means you throw your bad out on the dirt. He said as he was snuggling down into his bag and just about to fall asleep from exhaustion that he felt a hard little lump in his bag and dove down to get it. It was a miracle but he found a Laffy Taffy from a previous camping trip. He said that he couldn't even eat it because he was afraid that Marv and Bill would smell the banana Laffy Taffy on his breath.
Coward!
I asked Mickey what they ate and he said that Marv brought onions and potatoes and they ate the fish they caught. That was it.
When Mickey returned home his mother told me that he walked funny into the house and kept muttering under his breath....."I don't want to be Marvin's friend. I don't want to be Marvin's friend."
When I saw Mickey the next day he was still walking funny and he relayed the story above. All I said to him was, "Did you cry?"
He just looked at me and muttered, "I may have teared a bit but I had every right to what with starvation, dehydration, death defying allergic reactions, saddle sores, diaper rash and do you know they don't even stop to rest or go to the bathroom!
Needless to say, Mickey survived the test and this week we celebrated our 22 wedding anniversary.
I think my dad was just preparing Mickey for our married life.....(refer to all previous posts)
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| Mickey was getting prepared for fishing with this! |
